Date in my archives: 26-Aug-1995

Forwarded with subject: MORE GAS



Weiler's Law:
Nothing is impossible for the man who does not have to do it himself.

Weinberg's Second Law:
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, the first woodpecker to come along would destroy civilization.

Hartley's Second Law:
Never go to bed with anybody crazier than you are.

Beckhap's Law:
Beauty times brains equals a constant.

Katz's Law:
Men and women will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.

Cole's Axiom:
The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.

Jone's Motto:
Friends come and go but enemies accumulate.

Churchill's commentary on man:
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.

The ultimate Law:
All general statements are false.

The Unspeakable Law:
As soon as you mention something;
if it is good, it goes away.
if it is bad, it happens.

The Whispered Rule:
People will believe anything if you whisper it.

The First Law of Wing Walking:
Never let hold of what you've got until you've got hold of something else.

Eat a live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

Farnsdick's corollary:
After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.

Lynch's Law:
When the going gets tough, everybody leaves.

Law of Revelation:
The hidden flaw never remains hidden.

Langsam's Law:
Everything depends.

Hellrung's Law:
If you wait, it will go away.

Shevelson's Extension:
... having done its damage.

Grelb's Addition:
... if it was bad, it will be back.

Grossman's Misquote:
Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.

Ducharme's Precept:
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.

First Postulate of Isomurphism:
Things equal to nothing else are equal to each other.

The Unapplicable Law:
Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.

Witten's Law:
Whenever you cut your fingernails, you will find a need for them an hour later.

Perkin's postulate:
The bigger they are, the harder they hit.

Harrison's Postulate:
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

Conway's Law:
In every organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on.
This person must be fired.